Silence is a safe space for men. Women tend to think infidelity is the ugly monster one must not speak of. Infidelity is something men never talk about anyway until they get caught and feel remorseful. It is the other emotional stuff such vulnerability, emasculation, loss of power and status that men try to keep a lid on.
Vasectomy and any loss of fertility by a man is viewed as a surrender of masculinity. African cultures, obsessed with procreation, ensured that no man remained without children of his own.
Traditional gender stereotypes allow us to trivialise the danger men face in relationships. It is weak men who get abused. Only abusive boyfriends get passionately murdered. A ‘real man’ never has to wake up in the middle of the night to see if his vitals are intact after a nasty argument with his wife.